And yet another Crisis of Calling

Geez, right when you think your life is figured out, fate throws you a curveball. When I arrived at college, I was planning on graduating from Gordon with a Communications Degree, and a focus on film. My advisor, who is the head of the media departament, seemed cool. She used to be involved in the film world, and I was happy. I was planning on buying a digital videocamera, and going to film school next summer. Then by the time I graduated, I would have had practical film instruction, and theoretical teaching as well.

Well, several things happened.

One was that at Gordon the filmaking classes got cancelled because they lost the funding for a film program. Great. That stinks. But then when my chances of getting a film school experience got squelched earlier this week... It left me wondering what I was going to do.

As I told you, about a week ago or so, I did a personality test, which made me reflect on the way I am how I think and what I love. I am the kind of guy who likes to sit in his room and chill, write, think, take long walks alone, take off the competition and that kind of thing. Yesterday, I went to a meeting with some of the comm professors and with a former student telling of how he basically had to sell his soul to get into hollywood. I was crushed. I had not even thought of those ramifications.



So now I am left with the eternal, unanswerable and urgent question: "who the heck am I and what the heck am I good for?"



I need to decide... ummm... by next week. Yeah. That is when I set up my classes for the next semester. If I choose classes that dont go with my major (be whatever that may end up being) then I have wasted a lot of money. And I might have to do extra semesters, which all adds up to more money.



Being a monk doesnt sound so bad right now...